Stephen Merritt.

Stephen Merritt

"The wound is the place where light enters you."

Light is electromagnetic radiation, google says. The light can be sensed and seen by the human eye.

Some synonyms of light; Luminosity, illumination, radiance, luster, glow.

Such powerful words. When I thought of this word, light, in the light of all that has happened these past couple years, there was just one light that filled my mind, casting glorious rays into musty corners filled with dust and some avoided stages and feelings that go along with grief.

When Reagan's dad, Stephen passed away last year, I felt like a part of me had been sliced away. This was not just a wound, this was an amputation.

It's funny how hindsight makes everything seem trivial. What we find to fight about is never worth losing a connection over.

Not only did I lose a connection when he passed away, but even before that some selfish wants of my childish mind was the biggest factor of Reagan's missed connection with her dad for the first 3 years of her life.

They met, for the first time she could comprehend and remember, on her third birthday. From May through September they built a connection and created beautiful memories, a lot of which I was blessed to experience with them.

THAT was the wound.

That was the place where light entered me.

In one blinding flash, I realized that we are all beings of light. Carrying darkness within us casts shadows on love. We become ghosts clinging to the past.

There stood the person who helped me create the perfect bundle of atoms, soul and life that is Reagan. The candle that is always guiding me home when I am lost... and there stood me. Two people bonded together by another soul, torn apart because they were blinded by the sun what was our struggle of addiction.

The light that flooded through my wound inflicted by another, led me to reach out for the sake of my own life.

Through that light, I was eventually able to see life again. This time more real and clearer that I had ever seen. 

A connection was made from that with myself and a new found purpose, and it was beautiful.

The last couple years, there was no more beautiful light I can recollect.

The joy of reconnection, of finding inner truth and purpose, and cherishing the people we have beautiful connections with- That is LIGHT.